revision blues

taryari jones talks about how revision is a hell of a drug over on her blog. over on twitter i replied, “and right now i’m sooooo high!” little did i know how true that statement was. up until yesterday i had worked on my book every day this year. yesterday was day 45/32. even though i was exhausted, i dragged myself to the writing table each day, happy to put another day on my tally. a few days ago i got a scratchy throat. i usually do a pretty good job of listening to my body. i knew that i was getting rundown, that it was time for a break, but my ego was in charge. being in the thick of a revision can leave you with a feeling like being buzzed. i wanted to push, to get another day in. the perfectionist in me wouldn’t cut me any slack. i didn’t think i deserved a day off until i finished the section i was working on. never mind that i had been working for six weeks straight. that i worked through the superbowl and mardigras. it wasn’t enough. so devolved into a revision/perfectionist induced mess. yesterday i hit a wall. i always caution my friends, “if you don’t have sense enough to rest, you’ll just get sick so you can get some rest.”  so right on cue, i’m sniffly, sneezy and achy. finally, i’m going to take a nap.

you never knew the teenage me…

i like to call this our “men all pause” pose, standing in front of my first car. (i’m in the middle)

that’s me on the right in our pep club “uniform”. there were iron-on letters on the back.

me in 1989. football homecoming queen

over on tayari’s blog she has made a wonderfully kind appeal in support of the fabulous organization girls write now. i am very passionate about girls finding their voices. it was (is) difficult for me to find my own voice with supportive parents and a stable, loving home, so i know that for some girls this is almost an insurmountable task.

i am overwhelmed by the challenges that young girls face today to define themselves. i remember an interview with toni morrison recently where she said that she thought that women today were no longer burdened with the same issues as pecola from her first novel the bluest eye. now you know i love, love, love me some mama toni, but i think those issues for some are just as present. that there are still little pecolas in the world. the only difference is that now their mothers buy them the blue eyes and shirley temple curls. that under a veneer of sassiness and bravado lies shame, and fear and sadness.

these girls need stories. they need to know that they are important, their stories are important and we are listening. so share a photo of the teenage you and help a girl to find her voice. for more info, click over here to tayari’s site or go directly to girls write now to make a donation.